10 Ways To Have Men Approach You More

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The majority of dating advice for women out there might be a fun read but it’s hardly practical. It makes you feel great but it doesn’t actually translate to attracting men in real life. I’m here to change that. Meeting people is much easier for women than men. Why? Because


Men are visual creatures and his first impression of you is based on your appearance. That breaks down into two main parts: looking your best and looking approachable.

Don’t forget to smile

Guys are already frightened about walking up to a woman and introducing themselves. If you’ve got a scowl on your face, I guarantee no man is going to feel comfortable saying hi. Smiles are welcoming.

Eye contact is the most sexy

The top way to get a man to come up to you is by showing that you want to be approached. Guys wait for a green light signal to be sure that you actually want to talk to them and weren't just looking at the TV above their head.

Wherever you are: Dunkin Donuts, Barnes and Noble, the corner bar, the bank, a quick 1-2 second glance and smile is enough to say “Hey, I’m open to talking with you.”

And when you’re in a conversation with him, look in his eyes. You can break away periodically but if you’re constantly averting his gaze, he’s going to think something’s wrong.

Signal to him in a welcoming way

Crossing your arms and positioning yourself in a closed-off fashion puts up a blockade that men don’t want to test.

Keep your arms by your sides and leave some opportunity for a man to come talk to you. Instead of facing the bar, sit sideways or towards the crowd while talking to your friends. Glance around randomly and don’t be afraid to give those open invitations to guys you find sexy.

And please, stay off your mobile and enjoy being out. When you’re buried in texting, the only thing you’re conveying to a guy is “I’m busy, don’t interrupt me”

Take the initiative

Many men would kill for the woman to spark up a chat. The beauty is that men are just waiting to talk to you about something, anything.

The easiest and most natural way is by asking their thoughts on something, or a question. It can be about anything really, it’s just a way to get the ball rolling.


“Do you know what time this place closes?”
“Have you tried one of these cake pops?”
“What a cute dog, what’s his name?”
“Can I ask you something? How do you like these shoes?”

Trust me, it sounds silly but what you’re doing is giving the guy an opportunity to talk to you. If he’s interested, he’ll take the bait and run with it.

Looking your best: it’s all about the little things

When a new man sees you from across the bar, all he has to go on is your appearance and body language. His initial attraction to you is what makes him say “Hi”, but your sparkling personality is what makes him stay.

Dress to impress and wear something that shows off your features and flatters your figure. You don’t have to go crazy with makeup, but a little done well can brighten your face. Men thoroughly appreciate pretty hair, eyes, jewelry, and a sense of style (even though they might not admit it).

This is a touchy subject, but you’ve got to exercise and eat right. Health and vitality is a primary attraction switch in men and it’s good for your body, too.  :-)   dont hate me.

Avoid large groups and leave the men at home

If it’s your friend’s birthday or a celebration, have a big group night out. Otherwise, keep it to smaller, intimate gatherings. The more women you have, the more intimidating it is for a guy to approach. He has to fret about amusing all of your friends and making sure they all approve of him.  That is seriously scary.

Also, unless you’re trying to help a male friend get some, make it a girl’s night out and hang with him another time. Most guys’ first assumption when seeing you with a man is “they’re probably dating”. If it’s not that, he’s worried that he’ll have to deal with a defensive or rude guy trying to kill his chances.

Do not allow your friends to block you

If you’re hitting it off with a guy, be wary of your overprotective friends trying to shut him down. Let them know you want to give him a chance as long as they have someone else to entertain them (each other or other guys).

I understand girls look out for one another, but I’ve seen too many connections killed by jealous friends and grumpy roommates.

Be playful and laugh often

A good sense of humor is an incredibly sexy quality in a woman. You don’t have to necessarily be funny yourself, but you have to be able to laugh at his jokes. I know you’re anxious in the moment, but try your best. It’s extremely nerve-racking to be talking to a woman who’s not reciprocating. 

Be Positive.. always

Just enjoy yourself. Don’t keep thinking about how lame the party is or how you wish you were home.

The first thing I noticed about my wife before I went up to her was her huge smile as she was laughing with friends. She looked like a lot of fun. If you’ve got any negative vibes, guys can often tell from far away, and they’ll definitely feel it once they start talking to you.

When meeting a new guy, keep it lighthearted. Don’t be unnecessarily rude or a buzzkill. Putting others down or complaining about your crappy boss is a turn-off for a first impression.

Embrace your sexuality

Sometimes when you’re inexperienced, you’re uncomfortable thinking about a man sexually desiring you. But honestly, if he’s coming up to you, there’s a good chance he’s eventually hoping to hook up. Being a sexual person doesn’t make you a skank, it makes you human.

If you’re attracted to the man you’re talking to, be open to his advances. If he gives you a playful touch, don’t just back away. If he compliments you, smile and give him a genuine “thank you” rather than denying it. Don’t be afraid to return a flirtatious smirk or make a playful innuendo, either.

Take things at your own pace. If you’re not ready to be kissed or go further, you don’t have to do it to make him happy. You can say, “not right now” or “I’m not ready yet.” As long as you give him some signals that you’re interested, that’s what matters.